I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize