Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
how does that bad decision feel?
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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