I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize