in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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