Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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