What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
pop tarts are not kleenex
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize