you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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