It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
