The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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