We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
he puts the penis in happiness.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
