I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
How does it feel to date your dad?
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
