I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
