Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Randomize
