his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Randomize
