Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
