Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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