Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
