What a fucking waste of an outfit
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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