He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
