You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Randomize
