Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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