Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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