at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
