Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
i believe in u and ur pee
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
