Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
tell me about the eggs
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
