he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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