Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize