dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
This show inspires me to have sex in space
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
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