Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
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