I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
