But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
