i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
this beer tastes like vomit already
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
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