At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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