That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
