i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
