ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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