don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
