I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
