If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I need a beard to bite.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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