He is such a slut. More and more my type.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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