You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
