Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
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