i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
No I am not eating basil off your cock
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
