Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
