what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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