we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
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