Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize