Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
