Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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