no. you can't hotbox the world.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
